So my last post seemed/still seems conceited and self-absorbed. I apologize, it only happens one day of the year and now I'm past it. It's been about a 2 weeks since that post, I believe, and a lot has happened.
First off, I've been struggling with my Macroeconomics class. I've taken it in high school yes, but I suck at it. I always did Physics homework during that class and even now, when I actually try to learn it, I fail miserably. It's okay. Well, it wasn't before until I sent a very emotional email to my teacher and she told me I passed. I am grateful. So, so grateful. The week before the final, which I took last Thursday was death. I would disclose my grades, but then you would think I was some retard who couldn't read or something. But then again, with that sentence, you probably already think so.
Then, my terrible internship/bitch-ship at Izzy Gold and my love for Lalique's open position which I'm too young for, had me hating the work environment. I know both internships are bad for me in their own way but I know that Lalique does still have something to offer with Suzie still there. I'm just gonna take as much as I can these last few weeks while I search for another internship/job. Izzy on the other hand, I've learned has no benefits except for maybe peeping a few D-list celebs, but nothing more. Even with that, I'm not interested. The public life never seemed appealing, but I'll never know until it happens to me. I could be a media whore. I believe in myself. Ha. Anyhow, I was going off topic, I am officially leaving Izzy Gold. The CEO is super nice, but working under the Managing Director, cleaning up after him, organizing his closet, getting his medications, mail, UGH. I can't do it anymore. I know people believe that someone has to work their way up, but by doing this kinda work? I'm not a personal maid or personal assistant. I am an INTERN. I am here to learn. Teach me something that's useful and not something I have to put rubber gloves on for. Thanks.
So, I've been looking for jobs nonstop to no avail. I'm afraid I may have to venture back into the retail field and I am completely dreading it. We'll see how it goes. I need a job by the 3rd/4th week of July. If I don't, someone please offer me a job. Some people have it a lot easier than some of us and usually better off than me. I have no luck in anything except the fact my dad is lucky and I can mooch his takings. It's not right. I wish I were lucky. Some people get handed hostessing jobs with no experience, internships at big ass companies, huge scholarships while they're extremely rich and dumb. Life is just not fair. I hate this. A lot.
My life just seems to spiral downhill. I've begun my second session yesterday, Monday, with Principles of Financial Accounting and Intro to Photography. I'm not so excited about Accounting. I'm already dreading it, but that curve in Stern always looks oh so good which reminds me why I hate Stern. They always curve that shit so high. Top 35% are required to get A/A- then 50-55% receive B+/B- and the rest get C's. So I basically don't have to try and I'd pass anyway. That's nice. Fuck you, Stern.
I need a more positive outlook on life. Muse, where are you?
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